ok so ive been refining a dish for the last few months (it takes a while unless you want to eat the same damn thing over and over every couple of days) and i think ive got the basic dish down pat to the point i like it. actually, i more than like it, i think its out-fucking-standing. ridiculously delicious. anyhow, if you want to make it yourself, heres the recipe:

Taco Goulash

ingredients:

* 1 lb ground beef or ground turkey
* 1 oz (-ish) packet your favorite taco seasoning mix
* 1 can 7.75 oz of El Pato Jalapeno Salsa (find in the "mexican" section of your local supermarket)
* 1/2 can 15 oz Rico brand aged cheddar cheese sauce (condensed) (my local wal mart carries this, your supermarket may or may not, see "variations" below for what to do if you cant find it)
* 1 can 11 oz green giant mexicorn, drained (or other whole kernel canned corn of your choice)
* 1 rounded cup white rice
* 3 cups hot tap water

dishes needed:

* 1 10-inch skillet w/ lid
* tupperware to hold the leftovers. this makes a fuckton of food.

directions:

start by browning the meat. drain, return to skillet. add taco seasoning, salsa, cheese sauce, rice, and water. bring to a boil while stirring regularly. cover and reduce heat to simmer.

every 4 minutes, stir well then re-cover. after 8 minutes, add corn. total cooking time will vary depending upon the rice you used, and the consistency youd like. basically, keep cooking and stirring every 4 minutes until the rice is done and its nice and thick. then, eat up. its some good shit.

variations:

this is just the base dish, theres a LOT of room for creativity here.

your rice selection will affect the amount of water you need and how long you have to cook it. i use basmati because i like how it tastes and the firmness of the grains, but it takes more water and has to cook longer. you can reduce this time by soaking the rice in an inch of COOL tap water while you prepare the meat. drain the rice then add as usual. itll still take the same amount of water, but it wont take as long to cook.

you could also substitute some kind of pasta (usually a thick elbow macaroni for a more traditional "goulash" dish) for the rice, but since this always has leftovers for me, and i dont like how pasta generally holds up when being reheated, i stick to rice. i also think the rice tastes better.

you could easily add stuff like sliced jalepenos, green chilis, chopped bell pepper, leaf baby spinach, black or pinto beans (drained), chopped onion, garlic, etc... some things youll want to add at the beginning to let them cook more, others youll want to add at 4/8/12 minutes, use your own judgement. but youll probably need to make it in a bigger pan or pot. the default recipe will just barely all fit in a standard 10" skillet. its a fuckton of food, as i said. i guarantee you when its done youll be amazed at how damn much food you got out of those ingredients.

you could also turn this into a chili-cheese goulash just by swapping the taco seasoning for chili seasoning.

feel free to sub your favorite salsa for the el pato. depending on the salsa, youll have to adjust the water though. some salsas (especially white-people salsas like pace) are really watery. same goes for rotel tomatoes.

you can sub a different cheese in for the rico, but i recommend against it. yes, i know, youre thinking to yourself "rico, as in, the shit they pour on stadium nachos??" to which i respond "NO not the stadium nacho shit"... same brand, DIFFERENT product. you want the rico AGED CHEDDAR sauce. its real cheese (unlike velveeta/cheese whiz) and i assure you, its the cheese this dish WANTS. i did more experimentation with the cheese than any other part of this dish. i tried grated cheddar. i tried velveeta. i tried cheese whiz. i tried queso blanco. forget them all, the dish didnt really come together until i used the rico. just trust me on this one.

anyhow, if you try it out, let me know what you think, and what if any you added/subbed.